faith

Three Ways I Live with Chronic Illness

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I was wondering how faith helps others to deal with chronic disease. My counselor recently shared a letter with me from an older woman who has dealt with health issues all her life. While very encouraging, I realized many of my things that helped me are different than hers. My top three are:

1. Practicing gratitude. Gratitude gets my eyes off me and onto blessings I receive even in the midst of the hardest days. Gratefulness helps me recognize God’s fingerprints in my life and produces joy not based on my circumstances. This blog post below shares how God gave me a vivid real life illustration of the difference of gratitude and joy vs bitterness, resentment and anger.

https://joyfulrefuge.com/2017/03/23/the-choice/

2. Embrace my chronic illness as ordained by God for both my eternal good and His glory. As I submit to God’s plan in my life, my character and faith have transformed so much since my health tanked. Knowing God allows what makes us grow the most like Christ to conform me to be more and more like him enables me to try to see life from an eternal perspective and see His hand at work rather than be bitter or constantly asking “why me?” (Roman’s 8:28-29) Embracing it as His plan also helps enable me to accept my disease and embrace the new and ever changing normal. When diseases progress or symptoms change causing more loss, I grieve the losses and process it and eventually embrace what God has done. I still have bad days and am constantly trying to balance my doing with the needed rest and lack of energy of my body.

John Piper had an article on this with a quote that so struck a chord with me.

https://www.desiringgod.org/embrace-the-life-god-has-given-you

3. Word Saturated and prayer. If I am not regularly in the word and in prayer (communication) with God I will drift in my thinking and attitudes. I need to preach truth to myself constantly. With my past it is easy to go into old thought patterns of how worthless, unlovable and wrong I am and go into fear and/or panic attacks. Counseling has helped me immensely. One thing my counselor told me is my negative thoughts on self and fear and guilt have made big ruts in my thought processes and I need to make new paths of truth thinking. I have verses on spiral bound 3” x 5” cards that tell me who am in Christ (Ephesians 1:4-10, Colossians 3:12 etc) and ones to help me with fear (Isaiah 41:10, Isaiah 26;3-4, Philippians 4: 6-8 and more). I have read a few times God knows we struggle with fear and that it is addressed 365 times in the Bible.

Adjusting and living with chronic illness is a daily even moment by moment process. Symptoms change, diseases progress but Jesus is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. I constantly fail but so grateful I can run back to my Daddy God’s arms and He always accepts me, forgives me and loves me.

What has God shown you to help you in your journey with health challenges or trials?

Grateful for His loving grace,

Deb

Keep my Soul Happy & Nourished

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I saw more clearly than ever, that the first great and primary business to which I ought to attend every day was, to have my soul happy in the Lord. The first thing to be concerned about was not, how much I might serve the Lord, how I might glorify the Lord; but how I might get my soul into a happy state, and how my inner man may be nourished…I saw that the most important thing I had to do was to give myself to the reading of the Word of God and to meditation on it.

George Muller

When I spend time on God’s word it changes my focus, builds my faith, gives hope, peace and joy based not on my circumstances but on Jesus Christ. God’s word give me a lens through which to view the world and all that is happening around me. If I just watch news and read social media my heart can easily be in fear and turmoil. But if I filter all around me through the lens of God’s word, I can in faith say “it is well with my soul. “

https://youtu.be/AHe_qmo3gX4

https://www.godtube.com/popular-hymns/it-is-well-with-my-soul/

Blessings,

Deb

Our Good Shepherd

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Psalms 23 is such a familiar psalm that it is easy to recite it and move on without seeing the rich blessings of love, care, protection, and guidance our Good Shepherd provides for us. I remember in VBS the summer between second and third grade getting a prize for memorizing Psalm 23. I could recite it by rote, but did not grasp the rich meanings of it.
The Lord is MY shepherd!!! I am HIS lamb in HIS flock. He personally cares for me and each one in His flock. My shepherd is the Good Shepherd who lays down His life for the sheep (John 10:11). Because He is our Shepherd, we shall not want. This want is not speaking of physical or material riches. Phillip Keller writes in “A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23”—“yet amid such hardships he can still boast ‘I shall not want… I shall not lack the expert care and management of my master.’”
Sheep will not drink if water is moving or lie down if there is any fear of danger. The shepherd finds still pools of water that quench and refresh and green pastures of refuge and safety where He watches over them. Sheep are dependent on their shepherd to find the water, nourishment, safety, care and rest they need.

Source Unknown


How tenderly our God cares for each of us as His sheep! He gives us His living water and meets our needs. We are blessed with a refuge where we can safely lie down, rest and be at peace in His presence. Our Shepherd leads us on righteous paths to grow us into conformity to His image (Romans 8:29)—to become more like Him. When we go through seemingly hopeless situations, where death seems to lurk nearby, we can have peace and comfort in His wondrous presence rather than be overcome by fear of evil.
Lord, may we, as Your precious sheep, never forget to rejoice and express gratitude to You, the One who shepherds us through all our life until we reach eternity. Thank You for being the Good Shepherd who laid down His life for us, Your sheep. Enable us to recognize and remember to ever praise You for Your care, provision, protection, comfort and peace in both the green pastures and the dark valley of death. Thank You that in You we shall not want but can rest content in your perfect care.
In Jesus’ Name,
Amen.
~ Deb Peabody

Source Unknown

Trying to Flourish in 2020

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7 “Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose trust is the LORD.
8 He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.” – Jeremiah 17:7-8


Every December I begin praying and seeking God for the word to be my focus for the coming year. “Flourish” was my word I began this New Year as my focus for 2020 with Jeremiah 17:7-8 as my theme verse.

I never dreamed how much this would be needed as my focus when 2020 began. Pandemic, unrest, riots and political battle more heated and intense than have seen before in my life, as well as so much fighting and offense everywhere you look. This year looked like anything but a flourishing environment. 2020 feels more like a desert with searing hot winds blowing. Life has been disrupted in numerous fronts,, many jobs and businesses lost, loss of physical contact with the pandemic limitations and so much social and political upheaval.

My goal was to flourish and to not merely be surviving but thriving, growing and being fruitful in various areas of my life. The challenges of 2020 have cause me to run to my Abba God much quicker and more frequently, as well as seeking more fervently to be rooted in Him and His Word. When I do that, the “what if’s” and fears of the future disappear and I gain an eternal perspective. Sadly there are days I look to the circumstances and my faith begins to wither until return to Him and His living water. I am praying whatever the last 2 months of 2020 hold, I will continue to grow in Christ and my faith, to be quick to be loving, kind and compassionate and not give into the fear, worries and unrest all around us. I desire to be a flourishing tree with green leaves that bears fruit even in drought with my roots drawing my nourishment from God’s living water.

Wings of Hope

/ petitepea

But I will hope continually

and will praise you yet more and more.

– Psalm 71:14

One thing that keeps us going even in the hardest seasons is hope. Who or what do your base your hope upon? Is it the circumstances and people around you which can quickly change or fail you? Or is your hope based on the faithful, loving, sovereign, good and wise God who created and holds together every atom of the universe?

I recently did a word search through the scriptures on hope and found out what God’s Word says we can hope in. After reading various verses God laid a response on my heart in the form of this poem. I will share the verses at the end of this post.

Wings of Hope

Hope is a delicate bird, feathered and light,

That the slightest breeze can raise to greatest height.

God’s faithfulness and steadfast love

Cause wings of hope to soar above.

When winds of adversity fiercely do blow,

Hope draws from God’s Word that it trusts in and knows;

Soars to its Hiding Place and Shield,

To the Spirit’s lead it does yield.

The storms may bring turmoil and make one case down;

Hope flutters to life and in despair won’t drown.

Hope knows that it will again praise,

In darkness songs of worship raise.

– Deborah Peabody February 2, 2020

Hope in God’s steadfast love:

Psalm 33:2

Psalm 33:18

Hope in God:

Psalm 62:5

Psalm 33:2

Psalm 42:5

Psalm 71:5

Hope in God’s Word:

Psalm 119:74

Psalm 119:81

Psalm 119:114

Psalm 130:5

May these verses and others in the scripture dealing with hope bring you encouragement and greater hope in whatever season you currently find yourself.

Blessings,

Deb

The Refiner’s Fire

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I believe in seasons of high pain, shattered dreams or disappointments it is so easy to think of all you want, desire and dream more than our all sufficient, all powerful, faithful, sovereign, good and wise God. So thankful that His grace and forgiveness are limitless and no matter how many times I sin or stray from my first love He is ready to forgive and welcome me back.

My husband and I have just walked through the hardest 6.5 months of lies, false accusations and betrayal by those whom we least expected. It has showed me how much He alone is faithful and sufficient, especially when people are not.

Prior to this, I had  4.5 years of being like the children of Israel pining to go back to Egypt for leeks and onions and forgetting about their hardships and slavery. My “leeks and onions” attitude made me look back too often wishing I was back in Arizona and for the friendships we had there, rather than looking ahead or looking up to God. This hard situation revealed a new side to our life back in Arizona (we left there due to health issues April 2014) and made me press hard into God in my pain, confusion and loss.

God also used this to reveal many things to my husband and I about our own hearts in how we responded to this. I would hate to ever walk through this again, but can see God that used a grievous thing for my eternal good and His glory. Hopefully in weeks, months and years to come will see that more and more.

We all know and quote Romans 8:28 “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” But the way things work for good and the purpose is described in verse 29:
“For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers.”
The good purpose for all things is to conform us to the image of his son not our comfort or personal happiness.

Often conforming to Christ comes while walking through the heat of a refiner’s fire where the dross of sin, wrong motives and self focus are removed bit by bit. In my flesh, I often want God to be my fire extinguisher and put out the fire instead.

Take away the dross from the silver, and the smith has material for a vessel. Proverbs 25:4

The words of the LORD are pure words, like silver refined in a furnace on the ground, purified seven times. Psalm 12:6

He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver, and he will purify the sons of Levi and refine them like gold and silver, and they will bring offerings in righteousness to the LORD. Malachi 3:3

Reading this a few years ago really helped me to endure the fires of shattered dreams, health struggles and all suffering. Today it was a reminder I once again needed.

“One day we took the children to see a goldsmith refine gold after the ancient manner of the East. He was sitting beside his little charcoal fire. (“He shall sit as a refiner”; the gold- or silversmith never leaves his crucible once it is on the fire.) In the red glow lay a common curved roof tile; another tile covered it like a lid. This was the crucible. In it was the medicine made of salt, tamarind fruit and burnt brick dust, and imbedded in it was the gold. The medicine does its appointed work on the gold, “then the fire eats it,” and the goldsmith lifts the gold out with a pair of tongs, lets it cool, rubs it between his fingers, and if not satisfied puts it back again in fresh medicine. This time he blows the fire hotter than it was before, and each time he puts the gold into the crucible, the heat of the fire is increased; “it could not bear it so hot at first, but it can bear it now; what would have destroyed it then helps it now.” “How do you know when the gold is purified?” we asked him, and he answered, “When I can see my face in it [the liquid gold in the crucible] then it is pure.”
Amy Carmichael

My prayer is I will be conformed more and more to His image rather than fighting to put out the fire.

Blessings,

Deb

A Martha becoming a Mary

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38 Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house.

39 And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching.

40 But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.”

41 But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things,

42 but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.” – Luke 10:38-42

Before chronic illnesses slowed me down, my hubby called me the “Energizer Bunny” because I kept going and going and going. I was also very much a Martha go, go, go and do, do, do, the hostess with the mostest, involved in many church activities, walking, going to the gym, swimming, gardening, hosting smaller and all church events at our home that I also made sure were perfectly decorated.

In my Martha state, I was constantly fussing about how everything was done and worrying about the impressions I made on people. I spent time in the Word to prepare for Bible studies I attended to make sure I was more prepared and excelling more than others attending. I was forever concerned about what people thought of me, wanting to make the right impression with my looks, my actions, my words and my abilities. Life was frantic, distracted, fear filled and frenzied much more often than it was peaceful, focused, relaxed and faith filled.

My life suddenly changed in 2009. That November I fell while photographing fall leaves when I stepped into a pothole concealed by colorful autumn leaves. I ended up needing eleven stitches on my split open knee. After one dose of sulfa antibiotics I landed in ER with my first anaphylactic reaction. Next thing I knew I was reacting to all sorts of things I had previously tolerated. Fragrances , chemicals, cleaners, toothpastes and many foods suddenly were no longer tolerated. I began feeling like the girl in the bubble. After shuffling from doctors over the next few years received multiple diagnosis including chronic blood cancer, Mast Cell Activation Syndrome(MVAS) and A connective tissue disorder called Ehler Danlos.

As my symptoms increased and my energy ebbed, I really began seeking God, crying out to Him for answers and to show me how to live in this new normal. It was a really hard season of fading health, numerous unknowns and lack of strength to do all I did before. God met me through time in His Word and in prayer. Many sleepless nights due to insomnia, induced by high doses of steroids, were spent studying His Word and in prayer. I began to desire to truly know God and His character. My dear hubby was faithful to often remind me that God has sovereignly ordained us to be together and that we will walk together as a couple through whatever He sovereignly allowed in our lives, including chronic illness, to glorify our God. In this season, I began learning more and more about God’s character. I began to grasp He was Sovereign, holy, faithful, wise, just and good no matter what my circumstances happened to be. God began to help me memorize scriptures and enabled me to apply them to my life. This really strengthened my walk and grew my love for Him. As I spent more time at His feet, He began transforming me from an ultra Martha to a bit of a Mary. During this time of unknown yet failing health, He revealed to me He is most concerned about my eternal good and my being conformed to the image of His Son.

28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

29 For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. – Romans 8:28-29

God met me in amazing ways through examples in family members and friends as well as in His word and prayer. One friend greatly impacted me fairly early in my chronic illness walk, as she and her hubby sat in our home crying tears of joy at all the many ways God has met them and blessed them as she went through surgery, chemo and radiation for breast cancer. That same spring I read two books that greatly impacted me One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp and Choosing Gratitude by Nancy Leigh DeMoss.

Between my friends examples, personal Bible studies and my reading I saw the choice before me. I then purposed in March 2011 and asked God to enable me, regardless of my circumstances, to be a woman of joy and gratitude that ever sits at your feet. I am so grateful for the most part God has answered this request. At the time I did not think of it changing me into more of a Mary, but was one result of that answered prayer.

I am thankful I can trust in His faithfulness and goodness and to know His plans are for my eternal best and realize our earthly life is just a blip in eternity. I honestly believe if God had not slowed me down with various chronic illnesses, I would still be the Energizer Bunny version of a Martha. While lack of energy and symptoms may prevent me from doing many things, most days I can sit at His precious feet, be fed by His Word and pray as the Holy Spirit directs. I am at peace, have joy and gratitude, laugh easily and am so much more relaxed. I am now grateful for any help and even if not done “my way” to accomplish the task as it truly no longer matters. Our marriage is better than ever and we enjoy each other, appreciate each other and love each other more than before. Laughter is frequent and we joke about the plot twists in our life. Now when we have guests over the focus is how to bless them and make them feel our home is a safe, loving haven where before my focus was on how to impress. Sometimes my house is a bit messy and God has even used that to make people feel comfortable and makes me seem more approachable.There are days when I take my eyes off of my precious Savior and put them on me and my circumstances. There are days I must fight for joy and gratitude. I have purposed on those days to think of at least three things I am grateful for and either say them aloud or write them down. That seems to redirect my gaze back to Him, the lover of my soul, the One who sustains me and fills me with His joy, peace and hope.

While I would love to be healed, my prayer is that if God allowed it, I would not forget His using chronic illness to slow me down to transform me into much more of a Mary. The joy, peace, laughter, confidence and freedom from fears I now have from my Lord are of much greater value to me than perfect health. My devotion to my Jesus, my gratitude, my love for the gospel of grace, my compassion for the sufferings of others, love of His Word and prayer have all grown immensely as a result of chronic illness. I can say as the Psalmist said

It is good for me that I was afflicted, that I might learn your statutes. – Psalm 119:71

I would honestly choose to be a chronically ill Mary any day over going back to my former healthy but fearful frantic Martha state. May His transforming grace continually be at work in all of us!

Blessings,

Deb

Pretending to be Normal

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My life in recent years has changed greatly due to multiple chronic illnesses taking up residence in my body. My brain and emotions still feel normal even though my body doesn’t always respond.

I was recently asked in early December if I would like to host a dinner party in our home in appreciation of our church Life Group Leaders on January 5th . We were not planning on going out of town over the holidays and figured with hubby’s help could pick at it and be fine with it knowing would have a day or two of recovery afterwards.

The week before Christmas I looked at flight schedules to where our daughter and her family live and found a killer deal leaving Christmas Eve night. Only $82 for both of our round trips with taxes and everything. My hubby was the one preaching the sermon Sunday morning on Christmas Eve day, so leaving earlier not an option. We talked to our daughter and son-in-love and decided to go for it. Hubby could only stay until the 28the with work and church commitments but I booked my return flight for the morning of January 3.

The week before our trip I was doing a mad scramble trying to pack and get the a table runner and other decor made for the Dinner party. I made lists, meal plans and instructions for hubby to take Christmas tree down etc before I arrived home.

I had a wonderful ten days with my daughter’s family and so enjoyed the time with our four grandchildren between the ages of 6 months and 7 years old. Not sure if it was the lower elevation or joy of being with everybody but physically felt much better while I was there.

I arrived home mid morning on January 3 and life was a blur of trying to stuff reaction symptoms with meds, pushing through pain, cleaning, decorating and cooking. The other pastors and wives took care of prepping the prime rib and dessert which helped immensely. All was done with time to spare so we were able to relax for a few minutes before guests arrived. I popped some extra B-12 sublingual to give me energy and thoroughly enjoyed our evening. God blessed our goal of making the Life Group Leaders feeling blessed, refreshed and appreciated.

I slept or rested all day Saturday and went to church service Sunday morning and a reception that evening. Sunday night, as we returned home, I slammed into the proverbial wall and have been pretty much down for the count all this week. I am having pain, Mast cell reactions, and fighting a bug.

Several years ago I could have and did host many events in my home frequently without any impact. We were part of a church plant that met in a community center and later a school on Sundays so since we had a larger home and no kids at home, we hosted all church events as well as ladies bible studies, life group as well as frequent swim parties and BBQs. I thrived on it and loved every second of it.

When chronic illness struck I began having to count the cost on activities. I still love folks in our home and for the most part have smaller groups over and keep things very low key and simple. I think the masking of my pain by being on a pain medication since early November enabled me to feel better and I easily deceived myself into thinking I could once again do it all, like I was normal. And it was fun to pretend until it all came crashing down.

As I rest up this week, I am reminding myself, what I have shared on here before, to count the cost and decide on things based on eternal benefits and impacting others for Christ. I am also remembering my precious friend JoAnn, who passed away three months ago, always reminding me about not running out of spoons. I need another friend like her who understood limitations from her personal experience and was so fun, caring and full of faith to remind me. If you do not understand what that means read the Spoon Theory.

https://butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/

Would I do it again? Yes. But ask me again next week. 😉

I will include a few shots of the table runner I sewed and from my pretense of being normal. <><

hope all of you are all doing well and counting the cost of all you do in view of what matters in eternity.

Blessings,

Deb

Choosing Faith & Gratitude Amidst Pain

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Father in heaven, you know the questions that weigh heavily upon my heart. Just as I rejoice that you have chosen me to be witness to your awesome might, help me move from childhood to maturity about my illness. Let me not resist your plan for me, but go willingly, proclaiming to all that you are God.

Maureen Pratt from her book Peace in the Storm: Meditations on Chronic Pain and Illness.

I have found the times pain consumes me my eyes are on myself. I am focused on me and am forgetful of all the pain and suffering my Jesus endured at Calvary. He chose out of His great love to suffer and die for me, for you to make a way to pay for our sins so we can become His children.

Lord, enable me to choose to count it all joy (James 1:1-4)even on the days when pain is intense, others are not understanding or supportive and the long days of what ifs as wait for tests and further diagnosis. Help me to build my faith by recounting and reciting the many promises in your word to change my focus and attitude. In future days of intense pain help me to not wallow in it but to find things to rejoice in and express gratitude

In the name of the one who suffered all thing, Jesus Christ, Amen.

Faith came singing into my room,

And other guests took flight:

Fear and Anxiety, Grief and Gloom

Sped out into the night.

I wondered that such peace could be,

But Faith said gently,”Don’t you see?

They really cannot live with me.”

Author Unknown

Page 29 Grace Grows Best in Winter

Embracing My Consistently Inconsistent Life

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Chronic illness visited me and stayed after a fall in November 2009 that required ten stitches on my knee. When I went to my doctor two days later to have it checked, she started me on a different and stronger antibiotic due to inflammation and concern of a bone infection. After a single dose I end up in ER with a severe anaphalaxis reaction to sulfa antibiotic.

After that I began having more and more issues and was suddenly having allergic reactions to numerous things. The next year and a half was filled with multiple doctors and tests, being put on high dose steroids and numerous antihistamines. My health was not improving, I felt miserable and was not finding any answers. Finally, I went to yet another new doctor in the spring of 2011 and was diagnosed with MCS (Multiple Chemical Sensitivity) and a rare chronic blood cancer from a gene mutation that causes me to have high blood histamine which contributes to my MCS.

Prior to November 2009, I was up at the crack of dawn and usually to bed after midnight. I was constantly on the go, busy with projects, working out at the gym, swimming, gardening, church activities and social life. My husband and a couple close friends called me the “Energizer Bunny” because I kept going and going. Suddenly my batteries were out of juice and my body was not functioning.

One of the areas I struggled with most was making plans and then often having to cancel when the time came, due to my health issues. I felt guilt for letting others down, disappointment in not being able to do whatever it was, frustration with myself and resentment toward my illness. As I sought ways to deal with this frustration I began telling myself and others that I am consistently inconsistent due to my health.

STEPS TO EMBRACE BEING CONSISTENTLY INCONSISTENT:

1. View chronic illness as part of God’s sovereign plan for my life

My husband was a great help as he would frequently remind me of God’s sovereignty over my chronic illness and that it was God’s plan for both of our lives for our ultimate good and His glory.  Digging into God’s Word  and learning about God’s character and how He uses trials to refine and mature us helped immensely.

2. Recognize my limits and adjust expectations and schedules accordingly.(This step may need refined frequently with the ebb and flow of symptoms.)

This took me a good couple years of pushing until I hit a wall and then laid up for days or weeks afterwards before I learned. We began to see patterns and realized after exposures to fragrances and chemicals exposures being out and about on the weekend and going to church I was wiped out and needed Monday to be a crash day. Now I schedule Mondays as rest days where I sleep as late as my body requires and recoup. I often will need to sleep in late another morning in the week usually Thursdays or Fridays. I also learned I need buffer days between scheduled events as the exposures often will knock me down a day or so. For me, on a real busy day, where  I am cleaning house or prepping for a company dinner I need to take time every hour or so to just sit/rest a few minutes. By doing that, I find I do not wear out as quickly. Figure out the unique limitations for your chronic illness and how best to adjust your expectations and schedules.

3. Realize I have no reason to feel guilt or shame if too sick and need to cancel.

This was hard for me as I tend to be a “people pleaser” and struggle with fear of man. I now tell people as we make plans, I will be there if at all possible but due to my health issues I am consistently inconsistent. If I cancel last minute, it is not you or my finding something better to do, but that I am truly too sick.

4. Decide to choose the better over the good.

Because I am limited by exposures to fragrances, cleaners and other chemicals, I want to make my time when away from home to count for eternity. For me this means doing things to relate with people and serve others. To accomplish this, I must limit my times of exposures doing other things. I do much of my shopping online and at a couple local health food stores I can go to without reactions. My husband is always willing to pick things up for me which is a huge blessing. If I have to have a day of appointments and errands, I try to schedule it all in one day so only have one time of recovery. I am finally getting past my pride and wearing my carbon filtered mask into most stores. If an event is planned for Saturday, it will usually mean I will be down for the count and unable to attend church on Sunday. I then need to evaluate which will have the most impact on eternity and the people we love.

5. Ask God for new ministries that flex with good and bad days.

God has crossed my paths with several people with chronic illnesses in my own church, through blogs and in Facebook groups. God has given me opportunities to pray for these folks, send encouraging messages or texts or call them. And I am blessed by theirs. I also am part of our church prayer ministry and get prayer requests as they are shared via email.

We host a fragrance free life group in our home that my husband leads every week. Occasionally I am too wiped or ill to attend and stay upstairs or we have someone else host. We also enjoy to host some meals for friends as my health allows or take meals to new moms or when somebody moves into a new home. I don’t do it every time and schedule it on a day with buffers around it and have my husband deliver it to prevent exposures. Right now I am in a worse season of reactions so have not hosted or attended anything in over two weeks and that is okay.

I am currently taking a Biblical counseling course that is a home study but later on will involve observing counseling then being observed by a counseling pastor as I counsel. I have had many delays on getting this began let alone being done, so once again realize the timing is in God’s hands and it’s okay to be consistently inconsistent.

Michael and Margaret Robble are a couple in our church who have written a book on how God has met them through over 25 years of chronic illness. Their book is called “Always Sick, Always Loved.” I highly recommend this book! They are now in the process of writing a second book.

We met Texans, Michael  and Christy Hardy, through the Robbles. This sweet couple minister through a website and blog to encourage the chronically ill called Chronic Encouragement. We were blessed by them and their encouragement while staying in our home when they were visiting in the area. Michael has MCS like I do and also has difficulties staying in hotels. http://chronicencouragement.com/

6. Find mutual support.

God has blessed me with some wonderful godly friends in my church here in Colorado and in Arizona that have walked the road of chronic illness many more years than me, as well as others who are newbies on the journey. Between these local friends and others online, we are able to understand with empathy and compassion and encourage one another and point each other to godly truth. It has also been helpful in finding medical help and resources.

7. I am not my illness.

I am, above all else, a child of God. I am also a wife, mother, Nana, sister, daughter and friend that happens to have a chronic illness. While it may make challenges and life unpredictable, I am not my disease. I seek how best to fulfill each of my roles around and in spite of my illness. God has allowed my illness to transform me more fully into the image of His Son. He still has the same desires to see me grow in grace and bear spiritual fruit of love, joy, peace…

22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

I would love to hear from others and how you have learned to deal with living a consistently inconsistent life with chronic illness.

Love & Prayers,

Deb